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New Year's Resolutions - Turn Those "Wants" into "Goals"

From: The ChiFusion Tai Chi and Qigong Blog
Posted: Wednesday January 9, 2008

New Year's Resolutions -
Turn Those "Wants" into "Goals"

Greetings,

Since we've just started a New Year, let's take a break from our usual ChiFusion topics, and talk about something more in keeping with the season - namely, New Year's Resolutions.

This is the time of year everyone thinks about New Year's Resolutions.

Many people, around this time of year, decide:

• "I want to lose weight"
• "I want a better job"
• "I want a better relationship with my spouse"
• "I want to exercise regularly"
• "I want to diet"
• "I want to feel better about myself"
• "I want to start a new business this year"
• "I want to make more money"

Unfortunately, many of the New Year's resolutions we make in January are completely forgotten by March! That's because changing our life, our habits, and our thinking to get these things is difficult.

Many of you know me as a Tai Chi instructor, but you may not know that I also consult with individuals and small businesses, helping them to be successful, no matter what their goals are

And one of the keys I found to being successful with our goals and New Year's Resolutions is to examine how we think about our "wants". Often times, the way we think and speak about what we want can HINDER US from actually *getting* what we want.

What I'm talking about here is learning how to turn our "wants" into "goals" that we can accomplish.

The problem with the most "New Year's Resolutions" is that they aren't actually goals! They are "wants". And while it is important to know what you want, "wanting" alone is not enough.

Instead, you need "goals" - things you can aim for and achieve - in order to get what you want.

Four Steps to Turn a Want into a Goal

To turn a "want" into a "goal", you need to re-think and re-word your want so that it has four primary characteristics:

1. Measurable
2. Achievable
3. Positive
4. Present Tense

Without these four characteristics, you don't have a goal. You have just a "want."

So how do we apply these four characteristics? Let's take as an example one of the most popular "New Year's Resolutions" that people make: "I want to lose weight".

1. Measurable

Making a goal measurable means making it specific. It turns from a vague "want" into something a bit more definite.

A measurable goal is something that you can track, something against which you can see, feel, think about, and talk about your progress.

"I want to lose weight" is *not* measurable, but "I want to lose 50 pounds" is measurable.

2. Achievable

Once a goal is measurable, you can see if it's achievable - that is, if it is something you can probably do. An achievable goal is not just within the realm of possibility, but in the realm of probability. Is it likely you can achieve this goal?

If you've *never* lost weight, a goal of losing 50 pounds may be too ambitious. It might be better to start with a smaller goal, say losing 15 pounds. Of course, you can always start a new goal to lose more once you've lost the first 15 pounds.

But start with something that's easily achievable - then you can use "capitalizing on change" (an advanced technique we'll discuss another time) to build on this success to reach even more ambitious goals.

For example, "I want to lose 50 pounds" may not be achievable, but "I want to lose 15 pounds" may be achievable.

3. Positive

Goals should be phrased as positively as possible. The more the goal focuses on the positive aspects of a situation, the better we can focus on our goal.

"I want to lose 15 pounds" focuses on the negative (the loss). But "I want to weigh XXX pounds" focuses on the positive. (Of course, make sure you replace XXX with your target weight.)

4. Present Tense

Psychologists and motivational experts have found that phrasing goals as something we "want" or something that "will happen" in the future can block us from achieving them.

It is almost as if, when we think and talk about goals as "future" events, we are talking about something that is not happening in the present.

But if we talk about goals as if they are happening now, or as if they have already happened, they become much easier to reach.

"I want to weigh XXX pounds" is a future event. But "I now weigh XXX pounds" is happening now, in the present.

It may seem odd to phrase a goal as "I now weigh XXX pounds". It's obvious that that statement is not literally true at the time you set the goal.

Don't let that stop you from doing this step. This "present tense" phrasing is the MOST IMPORTANT STEP in this whole process!

Motivational experts have learned that something amazing happens when we think things about ourselves that are not literally true.

When we think things about ourselves that are not literally true, we try to "rearrange" how we perceive ourselves in order to make them true. We take steps, sometimes subconsciously, to bring our perception of the world in harmony with these thoughts.

So if we think, "I now weigh XXX pounds", our brain will help us rearrange ourselves - our life, our habits, and our other thoughts - to help make the statement become true.

As one of my mentors once said, it's as if we have two parts to our mind - a Thinker and a Prover. And whatever the Thinker thinks, the Prover will work to prove.

Whether your goal is losing weight, or getting a better job, or completing the ChiFusion Complete Course, that's what we want to happen with all of our goals - we want to prove they are true!

Wishing you success in all your goals,

For more information on "motivation for success", please visit NewSolutionsForChange.Com (click here)

And if you are interested in diet and nutrition, please visit CloudWater Instructor Carole Taylor's website. She provides tools for a metabolic-based approach to nutrition at YoungAfter50.Com (click here)

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